A new chapter in my life has started and that is one of being a married man. I am married to an amazing individual who is nothing short of perfection. Everything and anything that I could hope for in my wife she has in her. But what makes her so perfect? Tonight’s topic will be of the perfect partner. Those of you who are close to me will know of my mindset when it comes to relationships of any sort and now that I am married I reaffirm that belief. Before you get into any sort of relationship you must make yourself ready and worthy of that relationship. Are you friend material? Are you boyfriend/girlfriend material? Are you worth marrying? These are all questions that you must ask your own self and answer for your own self. I believe that everyone has about 5 things that they will never compromise on. Everyone also at the same time is looking for about 5 characteristics in whoever they want a relationship with. One must figure out the answers to these questions before engaging in any kind of relationship. Know yourself before you take on the adventure of knowing someone else. If you dont know who you are and what you are about how can you expect someone else to figure you out? If you dont know yourself how can you expect others to know how to treat you right? Now once you figure these things out for yourself you have to let your partner know what those things are. Once your partner knows these things about you and agrees to them then and only then have you created the best foundation and base to start building a relationship on. Everyone has been brought up differently. Everyone has had different experiences that has shaped who they are and the way they process things. It is essential that these things be known upfront to both you and your partner because only then can everyone know what is and isnt acceptable in the relationship going forward. Every relationship failing is your fault if you dont follow these things. At the end of the day the journey is how great of friends can you become with someone else. Do you have what it takes to be someone’s everything?
Its ramble time. I apologize if this gets personal. Friends are hard to come by. True friends. Im not talking about people who you are friendly with. Im talking about people who will move heaven and earth for you. People who will be there for you no matter what time of day it is. These people are rare. But a thing about True friends that most people dont understand is that True friendships are unconditional and that it doesnt always go both ways. Friendship is a choice and not a mandate. I am one of those people who loves immensely and fiercely. People who make me theirs and allow me to enter their worlds I keep forever. I am a friend to many and offer my friendship to all. I have and forever will be the understanding type. I have been told I am easy to talk to. I smile at that compliment because I find people intriguing. I enjoy complex people. But most of all I enjoy making them smile. The pleasure and ecstasy of being the reason for someone’s happiness and joy in life, even if it is for mere seconds means the world to me. I wish there were more like this in the world. I tend to be able to see the real you. The you behind the broken smiles and laughs. The you behind the mask you put on for the world so that their arrows dont pierce through you and finally break the last strands holding you together. Everyone has secrets and darkness that in exemplified within their own heads about themselves and thus they get this warped image of themselves that makes them seem ugly within their own eyes. But I have seen the effect a true friend can have on these people. Almost everyone around them shirks and scampers away because they dont want to deal with this or that. They cower at the images and darkness of others. But a true friend only smiles back and doesnt even flinch. I dont enjoy people’s brokenness. I enjoy them. It is these shards and cracks in a person that makes them so unique. So enjoyable. These quirks make you special.
So just know if you ever feel like you dont have anyone, know that you have me. Know that I am here for you. Know that if you need me to I will move heaven and earth for you. Know that your smile and laugh mean the world to me even if it is for a mere moment. Know that you are loved and enjoyed and needed. Know that you have a place in this world. If not in anyone’s then you do in mine.
Im sitting here on my computer with a lot on my mind and yet nothing at all. I dont know how to fel or comprehend things happening in my life and at the same time feeling hopeless that I dont have control over my own happiness. My future is clear and yet so foggy. In short im just a big ball of lost and confused. Good will hunting is playing on netflix in the background and the biggest point Im taking from it is that How do others know what is better for you vs what you want to do. Why doe it matter what I am doing with my life or how I utilize it. According to good will hunting watching such natural talent go to waste is almost degrading. Or maybe degrading is not the word. But what I see is that why doesnt anyone ever try to see things from the other persons perspective. Being unique is almost hell for geniuses.
The biggest question ive been trying to figure out for the past couple weeks is what is happiness. The sad part is no one can answer this for you. This is something you have to figure out for yourself. Happiness is different from person to person.
Sorry this post is just a bunch of ramblings.
Hope everyone has a good night.
🙂
Who are you? After the question of what is the purpose of life many struggle with the ever prevalent question of “who am I?”. Defining things is very easy but for sone reason when asked as to who you are most people are dumbstruck. How do you define who you are? Is it defined by your profession? Is it defined by your actions? Or perhaps your natural urges and tendencies? There may very well not be a right or wrong answer but let’s take a stab at it.
When asked to define a word we automatically give it’s meaning or interpretation. Most of the time context clues around the word are used to derive the definition. Why not use the same approach when defining ourselves? In order to give your existance a meaning why not look at yourself in the manner one does when defining a word. There is the textbook option of using a dictionary with words but most of the time the dictionary only leads us to more confusion unless provided in a sentence. So by providing context and use for the quarry we seek the true definition alludes the understanding.
So who are you? Obviously you are more than a word and therefore it will take more than just a word or a sentence or two to answer that question.
One of the biggest problems relationships face is change. We hear this constantly that you are not the same person I fell in love with. Is this a problem that we can fix? Lets break it down and see if we can find a solution so that more happy relationships may last longer.
Many things change in a relationship. Everything from the person to the relationship itself. All things start with the spark of an interest. That interest develops into a like or dislike and then further into love or hate. But alot of the time people complain that they cant see a future with the other person because they changed. First of all everyone changes. As times go on and the nature of the relationship changes so do people. But is change bad or good? Change can be bad or good depending on how you take it and what you do with it. Change is inevitable and so one must not focus on the change itself but the cause and root of this. This all starts with the intention one had when committing to the relationship. What was your reason so to speak of getting into a relationship with the other. Many categories and factors play a role in this like looks, fashion, money, knowledge, etc.
One of the most important things one must keep in mind is the why we got in the relationship. You have to have a reason to ground you to it because if in your mind you are just looking for a temporary thing than you are already planning your break up. But if your true intention is that this relationship be the last thing you ever have then you make it last forever. In other words regardless of what happens we should keep in our minds that we are not going to give up on one another no matter the cost.
This mind set cuts down on a lot of the “change” issues that arise. But still there are a few that may cause a tension. Before you get into a committed relationship bare in mind what you would consider an absolute no. Bare in mind that not everything about you is attractive and not everything about you is loveable no matter how perfect you are for one another. This is where the compromises come in play. As long as you keep focusing on the positives everything will play out fine.
People will change. One thing to keep in mind is that no matter what happens always be true to yourself. Be true and honest. There is a difference between the truth and being honest. People may change the way they look, they may change their fashion style and the car they drive but never change what you stand for. You may change the way you see each other or the way you think but never change who you are as a person and what you represent. If this changes then you are looking at bad change where as everything else may be considered good because that is adapting to the change in the relationship.
Never be afraid to talk to one another. Once you are in a committed relationship you must work as one and not 2 separate entities. Communicate everything regardless of how irrelevant it may seem. Know that you both have each others back and that even if you fall they will be there to catch you. Know the limits of each other and respect them. Everyone changes but if you change together as one you will last forever.
SO for the past couple of days I have been bored trying to pick up a new show to watch. I rarely ever get into reality tv because honestly there is nothing we can take from these shows. There is no real emotion. There is no real story. There is no real moral or purpose of them. But this is not the case with what I picked up recently. The show is called Undercover Bosses and it is available on Netflix.
I just got done watching an episode and it got me thinking about a few things. Well to be honest I had been thinking about this since last tuesday and the issue at hand for me is Corporations and their employees. It really upsets me to see some of the things these companies do when it comes to treatment of their employees.
Before I write on I would like to say that I have been a leader of many groups and my work ethics when it comes to my team is something I am proud of. Also the old saying that the customer is always right is utter bullshit.
When you are the leader or head of your team or group it isn’t just your job but your responsibility to lookout for your team. Any boss that sides with the customer over their own employee at the expense of the reputation and dignity of their employee deserves to be fired. If you have an employee that gives it their all to lookout for the best interest of the company he or she works for and due to one reason or another makes a mistake or two that costs the company a few customers does not deserve to be treated like shit. The customer isnt always right. As the boss or leader it is your job to stick up for your followers and workers. If for whatever reason an issue escalates then you as the head should put your own reputation and image on the line rather than use the employees as a cushion for the punches thrown by the customer. Once the whole situation resolves then you may take the employee aside and talk with them about their performance but never should they be called out or ridiculed in front of customers ever.
What are your thoughts? Are you a business owner or manager? have you had issues with this? How have you resolved them?
The simple act of being a friend to someone is enough to change someone’s brain chemistry to be better. Friends are hard to come by. True friends. People worthy of the entitlement of friend. Not your average joe who you met along the way but a person who knows you for who you are and can make decisions for you not the ones you would make but judgement calls so that you would be better as a person and human being. That is a friend. One that isn’t afraid to say no nor is he afraid to say yes when the moment arises. A true friend is one that no matter what you say or do he or she will always be there for you. No amount of hurt or pain can cause them to shun you away. It is only by disregarding them, by abusing them, by using them, by not being thankful of them will you ever lose a friend. So remember the next time you are mean or abusive or neglectful in your duties towards a person. By doing so you may have lost your chance of making a friend.
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Walmart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women – she loves to browse.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Walmart
Dear Mrs. Woolf,
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Woolf, are listed below and are “documented by our video surveillance cameras”:
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-
minute intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women’s restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
voice, ‘Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away’. This caused the
employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted in management getting involved causing management to lose time and costing the company money.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of
chips.
6. August 14: Moved a ‘CAUTION – WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department – to which twenty children
obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began
crying and screamed, ‘Why can’t you people just leave me alone?’
Emergency Medics were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the Sports department, he
asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly
humming the ‘ Mission Impossible’ theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his ‘Madonna look’ by using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
through, yelled ‘PICK ME! PICK ME!’
14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed ‘OH NO! IT’S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!
15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.
And last, but not least:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
awhile, and then yelled very loudly, ‘Hey! There’s no toilet paper in
here.’ One of the Staff passed out.
Hey all!
Balphy here and wanted to just give you an update on stuff happening in my life right now. Its been very frustrating and its just one thing after another right now but as with anything life goes on. Just taking it one day at a time.
I got my hours cut and instead of working 5 days a week I’m down to 3.. yea.. that sucks major ass.. but I’m pulling through. lets see what life has in store. But what has pissed me off even more than that is this fucking white piece of trash who goes by the name of Gene.
Yes he is trash. This little kid is my girlfriend’s ex and is a creeper to say in the least.. he also has major issues to the point where he is stalking my girl and taking over her online profiles and accounts and stuff. I’m to the point where if the police don’t do anything about him I will. Talk about talking to your girl on Skype and then her Skype shuts down randomly only to come back on as this fat, hairy son of a bitch on the screen.
UGH! Seriously this jealous piece of shit needs to back off and mind his own damn business or so help me God I will make him wish he died.
Spoke with Xbox/microsoft about the issue and hopefully this gets resolved in the next 3-4 days.
On the bright side I got a new router 😀 Yay!
Hey all!
Damn a year has gone by already. So much has gone by and all things considered 2012 has been very interesting indeed. Ill try to recap what happened in 2012 for me and lets see if I can pave myself a path for a more interesting and adventurous future. So many things have happened and I dont know where to start.
Lets start with gaming after all I am a big gamer and gaming is an integral part of my life. I started out in KSI a community of gamers on xbox. It was fun. In KSI I was on the board and ran many departments and headed many projects like the dept. of education, Human Resource, The courts, The A/V team just to mention a few. Around August I had a falling out with other members of the board and so I left and revamped my own community call Gamerz Dynasty. We are a small community looking to grow and hopefully be something other gamers would look to join.
Many games were released. A few that were immensely satisfying and a few that were just so bad. For example Halo 4, Borderlands 2 and Hitman are just a few to mention that were beyond amazing. I think the most disappointing game for me was Assassins Creed 3.
In my own personal life many changes have happened. First and foremost Ill mention that I think I may have found the love of my life. That one person that I can see myself spending eternity with. Why her? if there was a few reasons id detail them but Ill try my best to tell you why her. But before that let me just preface by saying that I am one that is very hard to impress and due to my past experiences in relationships I have been inclined to stay single. But then she came along. I kid you not when I say that she had me falling for her and getting more and more intrigued by her by the second when we started talking and I didnt even realize it. Off the bat she could see pass my masks and walls and was awed at what she saw behind the veil. But best of all is that unlike most people she didnt try to break down my walls and defenses. Instead she snuck in through the back door and into my heart without even alerting me. Her personality is just simply amazing. Her sheer presence puts a smile on my face. Her smiles make my heart flutter and her laughs just make me want to hold her for eternity. So for the next year I aim to actually hold her in my arms and make her mine for real.
Im an optimist but a realist at the same time so I do have a few words Id like to part with. Many atrocities have happened in the past years and so Ill say that please cherish the moments you have because you never know when something may happen. Dont live with regrets and what ifs. go get what you want. Dont sit back and let opportunities fly by because living in regret will get you nowhere. Enjoy life. It is actually very easy. Find joys in the simple pleasures of life. And best of all leave a mark on the world of who you are in the hearts of others. Show the world what you are capable of because your life may fade away and your name may be forgotten but what you teach others will live on for eternity to come.
Balphazar's Blog 